Date #10 - Abel

I generally would not like to classify this as a date, but because I have at one point been attracted to my friend Abel, and he to me, I will mark this as an official date.  Don't tell him I said so though.  :)

Hadn't talked to my friend in a long, long time.  So we caught up.  He picked me up after work and we went to the Cafe Del Rey Marina.  Very upscale, very nice!  No need for much background story with him, so let's just cut to it:

Pros

• We get along REALLY well.  So easy to talk to him about anything.
  
• He makes me think in different ways.  I guess it's just his perspective on things, but it's really unique and he pushes me to think outside the box.  I really love that about him!
• He's very smart.  When he explains something to you, you see it clear as day.  Very good teacher.
• He's super entrepreneureal.  He started his own business about a year ago and he is doing very, very well for himself.  Loves what he does too!
• He's a great listener.
• He will look straight into your eyes as you talk to him.  Quite intense, but I've been able to learn how to do this and mirror it back.
• He's very generous.  Even though we are just friends, he always insists on paying for lunch/dinner.  He lets me pay once in a while though.  Like tonight he wouldn't hear of me paying, but allowed me to pay next time.  :)
• He has the same spirit as me.  We like to be free.  We like to explore.  We both take on the same patterns in a relationship.

Cons

• He's too similar to me.  I don't think we could get along as a couple since we are too similar!
• He's a bit short, although I don't mind that much.
• He's super into material things.  I like my share of toys and worldy goods, but he really, really likes that stuff.

As we discussed my adventures with the 30 date challenge, he threw out the idea that perhaps I just have a cycle.  A 2/3/whatever-year cycle where I get bored for one reason or another and move onto the next relationship.  He says that he operates exactly like me.  The boyfriend/girlfriend we are with holds all the traits of a perfect match, yet somehow, we start to get antsy and we break free.

He also said, it may not be a bad thing to work that way.  The only difficulty being, once you get older you won't be able to hop around as much.  So you either settle down with the best that you've got, or you are alone for the rest of your life.  Both not very awesome prospects, but that's the results from the lifestyle that we lead.

I understand this idea, but I don't want to believe that I'm a cycler like that.  I like being with someone I love.  I like sharing my life with someone.  I like taking on the world with a partner by my side.  But am I just ill-fated to never be content?

I really love hanging out with him.  I feel enlightened just being in his presence.  He's able to hold a mirror up to me and help me assess myself.  Without being judgemental.  And helps spin situations that I've always looked at so I can see things from a different angle.  Shows me ideas that I'd never thought of before.

I told him that the next date better be pretty fucking great after my awesome dinner with Abel.  He laughed.   And oh boy, if I had only known....